For some reasons i really hate my life. But somehow i really appreciated it. Experiences is always a good teacher in life. i’m doing okay now…Maybe.
Aa-aa-AhchumM!…Sorry,just a flu… Hehehe! Well, exam’s over and here come school break! I’m not planning to go anywhere but i’m not feeling well… I hate this sickness…
Last night I sit out side alone looking up to the night sky. Suddenly I smiled for no reason. I sighed… it has been a long time I didn’t look up to see the ornamented starts like this. My hectic life neglected me from things I used to enjoy before…
I’m counting the stars. (^_^) Even though I could never calculated it all but every time I did so and wonder if there is someone or life out there that watching over me or perhaps staring back at me…I wonder… But it always makes me feels better. Away from all the problems and other things/responsible for a while… it does calm my soul. Then I start whispering a pray inside my heart asking God to bless and look up my parents and family. Keeps all my beloved friends in safe and happiness to people around me. And as for my self, I just wanted a little blessing, faith and strength to carry on with this long journey of life. Wishing somehow I will make it through till the end of life.
I recalled back the memory throughout these recent 2 years. So many things happened and have changed. Somehow I noticed I’m also altered by the time. Who I am now is never seem imperative and I sometimes couldn’t understand it myself.
I was confused at the beginning and turned to hasty decision. But it was (perhaps) a good thing and I really appreciate the happiness I gained thought it’s just temporarily. Till one day, the day where all the misery surrounded me… I fall. I failed. The unforgettable experience and feelings overwhelmed me. I felt terribly alone…I have no close friends around me. The guy who was always by my side also left me though I loved him with all my sincere heart. I wept every loneliness night unable to control my emotional feelings. I was never like that before… I used to be so strong and capable person. Though I’m young by the age but I’m mature enough to take responsibilities and always an optimistic one.
Until one day, I’ve found my path again thought it’s still hazy.
I told my self, “it is time to move on”. Even though I’m walking down the path alone but I never regretted it. But I thank God I still able to carry on. Things that happens before is just a ‘test’ for me and I have accepted it. Thought I still miss few people that close to me before but its okay. It’s a normal feeling. We can’t simply erase someone from your mind like you erasing unknown phone number in your mobile phone! (^_^)
I believe it takes time and time will me everything. I may loses a lot today but soon I will get more than that… it’s time to enjoy what’s life can bring! If I don’t cheer up myself, there’ll be no body that will!
~~~~Cheerio!~~~~
